The way depression is diagnosed, with a questionnaire about your feelings and behaviors and their durations, is not as perspicuous as, say, a blood test for diabetes. There’s no way of knowing that you’re in need of medication until you give it a go and see if it helps with symptoms.

Over the course of so many years, I’ve tried everything from medication to meditation to try and tame this little (sometimes big) monster. What’s worked during some periods hasn’t worked in others and it’s been a journey of self-discovery, resilience, and compassion for myself during the process.

Winter-Pattern Seasonal Affective Disorder (often referred to as SAD) is a type of depression that comes and goes with the season.

“Major depressive disorder affects approximately 17.3 million American adults, or about 7.1% of the U.S. population age 18 and older, in a given year. (National Institute of Mental Health “Major Depression”, 2017)”

It’s like my brain has a bit of a stomach ache.
Or like my heart has a headache.
My stomach has the sniffles.

I am weary.
Some days are like this.

I have enough co-annoying disorders and invisible illnesses that I can’t necessarily point to one and give it all the blame. I also wear a lot of hats (figuratively).